


you don’t have to hold my hand (but i wish you would)

by writemeastoryofmylifeandtellmeif_i_live



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Ouch, just ouch, ouch feelies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-21
Updated: 2017-01-21
Packaged: 2018-09-18 22:32:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9405776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writemeastoryofmylifeandtellmeif_i_live/pseuds/writemeastoryofmylifeandtellmeif_i_live
Summary: I have one this time.The words below are meant to rip you apart and leave you in itty bitty pained pieces.#summarized





	

_“kara, i love you-you know i do–but this hurts and i can’t be here right now. i just-i don’t think i can do this. i **have** to–kara **i have to go**.”_

It had been three months since Alex had _left her_. **Three months** of giving her time, space, distance because that’s what Alex had asked _(begged)_ for. **Three months** of staring at Alex’s name in her contacts list, knowing there would be only silence on the other side if she ever gathered the courage to hit that call button. **Three months** of relieving the _moment_ that had fractured a bond _she had thought unbreakable_. Three months without Alex’s steady heartbeat, the tired lilt her voice took on at two a.m. when she stumbled into their bed after a _long_ day at work _“shit-shit-no, i’m fine ka-i’m fine. go back to sleep, i’ll be right there.”_ and _the way she draped herself over Kara_ when they were binge watching Netflix; _laughing_ , _happy_ , _**in love**_. 

_“alex you don’t **understand**! i’m trying to keep you safe! i would do anything to keep you safe-plea-please alex–”_

That first night on her own she _couldn’t_ get comfortable. _The bed was **too** big and the sheets were **itchy** and **nothing felt right** and she just wanted to roll over and see Alex’s head poking out from under the covers, but **she was gone** and **Kara was alone**._

_“alex **please don’t go** - **i need you** alex please-no-no alex if you walk out that door i will-i will **never forgive you** -please we c-can work this-”  
_

**_Three months_**. **Three months** _of going_ _through motions that no longer seemed relevant_. **Three months** _of **biting her tongue** around Hank because Alex **would have** told her where she was going… if she had **wanted** her to know. _

_“you **promised me** that i would **never be alone** again, but **here** i am… and **where are you**?”  
_

Alex watched the sunset in Barcelona, phone in her hand and Kara’s face on her screen. She almost called; almost hit the button and let herself hear Kara’s voice for the first time in months. _Almost_. But, the phone fell from her hand, her eyes settling on the sun as it dropped below the horizon, and **she left Kara on that balcony** , _because sometimes love just wasn’t enough and you had to walk away before **you forgot how**_. 

_“forever is the way **she loved me**. forever is the way **she saved me**. forever is the way **she stood by me**. and forever is the way she looked when **she walked away**.”_

_**Kara and Alex**. Two halves of a soul **torn** apart. **Two people who were meant for each other**. Two people who **destroyed each other** instead. Because sometimes **love** is just **destruction** and  **devastation**. Sometimes it fails and falls apart and you lose it all because you wanted it too much… needed it too much. _

… **and they have to live with that**. _**But god… how do they live with that?**_  


End file.
